This just in: ESPN is amazing.

See...

it's so easy to get pissed about watching channels like MSNBC and CNN because all they talk about is random bullshit full of cockamamy. Mostly semantics about the election, private lives of those involved in the election, or private lives of anyone else in our government. Anyway, ESPN is hilarious because it's hard to get pissed about what they're talking about. It's just fun talk all day. All of the commercials are geared towards beer-drinkin'-wife-neglectin' DUDES. Doesn't matter if you're 16 or if you're 60... when you watch ESPN, you're a DUDE. I love it when you watch ESPN all day and every show is about the same stuff except different people say the same things different ways. It's so entertaining. The best part about it though is when they talk about golf. They seriously think that Tiger Woods' dominance is unquestionable. Like, I would love to agree, but he's just simply the best golfer ever. But he's also in a group of the best golfers in the world... so he's not completely dominant. He's lost plenty of tournaments... and DIDN'T win them. I dunno... just goofy. I love you, ESPN Only because you're gutter media that's really FUN.